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hi guys, i have an essay for my ap lang class and it’s all about what you believe in. it could be the stars, macaroni and cheese, buddhism, your otp, troye sivan, or even a fluffy chicken. i was hoping to get some answers from you guys, so all of your responses are appreciated!
A banned book is what happens when a novel or non-fiction work gets so popular and well respected that a human grows jealous of it and tries to get people to stop reading it.
See, humans have what psychiatrists call, “Publication Envy.”
Publication Envy is where an individual becomes upset by the fact books are going to outlive them. Humans live to 125 years tops, while the oldest known Sumerian books have been known to live past 4,500 years, and those are still selling today. Humans simply can’t compete. So when a person finds a book likely to outlive them, they attempt to have it banned.
Banning a book is a fool’s errand of sorts because you can’t actually ban a book anymore. You might keep it out of one library or a school, but the notoriety one grants the book by doing so ensures ten more schools and libraries will book a copy, pardon the expression, for themselves. Thus trying to ban a book inevitably ensures that books immortality and victory over the envious pathetic human.
So it’s critical to me that Valhalla be banned. I’m not ever having children, that’s just how it is. So my books are the closest thing I’ll create and unleash upon the world. And like any parent, I wish my kids could live forever.
So please: Ban Valhalla by Ari Bach. Keep it out of your local school or library or even your neighborhood book club. Any prohibition helps. Let’s work together people. If we can get that one girl a fluffy chicken, we can ban this book.
so what happened to the fluffy chicken?
whatever happened to fluffy chicken girl
Did fluffy chicken girl ever get her fluffy chicken
do y’all remember that time we got a fluffy chicken for someone
did that 1 girl ever get her fluffy chicken
Okay but real talk: did that person ever get the fluffy chicken??
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